Welcome to the Big Woke Dictionary, your one-stop snark shop for decoding the ever-mutating, chronically self-replicating dialect of the modern left. In this brave new world of progressive buzzwords, language doesn’t just evolve—it gets drag queen-level reinvented daily, with fresh terms dropping faster than genders on a college intake form. One minute you’re “inclusive,” the next you’re “problematic adjacent” because you asked what a “demiromantic panqueer” is without first citing your privilege. Liberals treat language like it’s a vegan charcuterie board: always rearranging it to feel better about the same tired ideas, just with more syllables and self-importance. Keep up—or risk being canceled in three dialects you didn’t even know existed.
If I am missing an entry or if you are baffled by a word or phrase, submit it to me via email HERE.
A (is for Activist)
Activating Community
Pronounced: /ˈæktɪveɪtɪŋ kəˈmjuːnɪti/
Definition: The vague process of sending a lot of group texts and pretending your friends are a movement. Often includes calls to action that no one answers, and one guy named River who brings bongos to every meeting.
ACTIVIST
Pronounced: /ˈæk.tɪ.vɪst/
Definition: Someone who believes that tweeting a thread, attending one protest, and adding a Black Lives Matter yard sign makes them the second coming of MLK. Often seen in oversized sweaters, clutching a reusable water bottle covered in stickers that scream “ACAB” while sipping a $6 latte from a gentrified coffee shop in a historically Black neighborhood. Specializes in posting vague calls to “do better” without ever clarifying what the hell “better” looks like. Thinks “raising awareness” is a job title and “organizing” means making a Canva slideshow for a teach-in no one attends.
Ally
Pronounced: /ˈælaɪ/
Definition: A non-marginalized person who supports the cause… as long as it doesn’t interrupt brunch. Can be revoked at any moment for the crime of saying, “I’m trying my best.” Must attend workshops and apologize weekly to stay in good standing.
Allyship
Pronounced: /ˈælaɪʃɪp/
Definition: The performative act of pretending to support marginalized groups by sharing infographics on Instagram and buying a BLM t-shirt from Target. May or may not involve understanding the actual struggle.
Anti-Racist
Pronounced: /ˈæntaɪ ˈreɪsɪst/
Definition: Not just not racist—that’s for amateurs. You must now dedicate your entire being to dismantling racism in all its unseen forms, including traffic laws, standardized tests, and gluten-free crackers. Passive allyship is white supremacy lite™.
B (is for BIPOC)
Banned Books
Pronounced: /bænd bʊks/
Definition: Books no one was reading until someone in Texas tried to remove them from a school library, prompting liberals everywhere to suddenly pretend they loved Toni Morrison in 9th grade. Now a status symbol and an aesthetic.
BIPOC
Pronounced: /ˈbaɪˌpɑːk/
Definition: Black, Indigenous, and People of Color—a term that tries so hard to include everyone that it somehow pleases no one. It’s the human rights version of a diversity potluck where no one brings seasoning.
C (is for Cisgender)
Call-In Culture
Pronounced: /kɔːl ɪn ˈkʌltʃər/
Definition: Cancel culture’s gentler cousin. Instead of public shaming, it’s “Hey, can we talk about your microaggression over herbal tea?” Still ends with you sobbing in your car, but in a more affirming way.
Cancel Culture
Pronounced: /ˈkænsəl ˈkʌltʃər/
Definition: The righteous act of digitally obliterating someone’s career because they made a joke in 2013 or liked a problematic meme. Denied by the left as “consequence culture” but practiced like organized religion. Saints are rare. Martyrs are plentiful.
Centering [X]
Pronounced: /ˈsɛntərɪŋ eks/
Definition: The progressive art of turning attention to a group or issue, unless that group is white men, in which case—how dare you. Common usage: “Let’s center queer, BIPOC, disabled voices.” Subtext: “Shut up, Chad.”
Centering Voices
Pronounced: /ˈsɛntərɪŋ ˈvɔɪsɪz/
Definition: The act of putting someone else’s perspective at the front—unless that person is cis, male, or owns more than one Patagonia vest. Used in every conference keynote, yet never applied to the Q&A lineup.
Check Your Privilege
Pronounced: /ʧɛk jʊr ˈprɪvəlɪʤ/
Definition: Translation: “Shut up, Brad.” Usually used by someone with a gender studies degree and Wi-Fi strong enough to stream four simultaneous TedTalks. A conversational kill switch with the subtlety of a flying brick.
Cisgender
Pronounced: /ˈsɪsdʒɛndər/
Definition: A person whose gender identity matches their biological sex—aka, the default setting you’re supposed to apologize for. In woke circles, identifying as cis is like showing up to a vegan potluck with a rotisserie chicken: technically allowed, but socially radioactive. Often used as a prefix when someone needs to remind you that your opinion doesn’t count in this conversation, Chad.
Climate Justice
Pronounced: /ˈklaɪmət ˈʤʌstɪs/
Definition: The intersection of environmentalism and social guilt. Used when you want to talk about the planet but make it about racism, too. Warning: likely to include graphs, Greta Thunberg quotes, and an urge to shame your neighbor’s gas-powered lawnmower.
Co-Creation
Pronounced: /koʊ-kriˈeɪʃən/
Definition: The process of building something together in theory, while one person does all the work and the rest offer “spiritual alignment.” Found on nonprofit mission statements, community theater programs, and nowhere in actual results.
Community Guidelines
Pronounced: /kəˈmjuːnɪti ˈɡaɪdlaɪnz/
Definition: A digital manifesto that pretends to foster kindness but is really there to ban you for saying something “tone-deaf” in a 45-comment thread about pronouns. Vague enough to mean anything. Strict enough to mean you’re gone.
Community Organizer
Pronounced: /kəˈmjunɪti ˈɔːrɡənaɪzər/
Definition: A title often used by people who’ve never actually organized anything except a protest with six people and a ukulele. Think “activist,” but with more GoFundMe links.
Cultural Appropriation
Pronounced: /ˈkʌltʃərəl əˌproʊpriˈeɪʃən/
Definition: What happens when a white girl wears a sari to Coachella and Twitter explodes. The line between appreciation and appropriation is thinner than a Gen Z eyebrow.
D (is for Decolonize)
Decentering Whiteness
Pronounced: /diːˈsɛntərɪŋ ˈwaɪtnəs/
Definition: The act of shoving white folks out of the spotlight, usually while still taking donations via their Venmo. Often used in workshops with names like “Unpacking Your Colonizer Mindset” and “Deconstructing Becky.”
DEI (Diversity, Equity & Inclusion)
Pronounced: /diː-iː-aɪ/
Definition: Corporate code for “please don’t sue us.” Often involves mandatory trainings, vague mission statements, and hiring one bisexual intern named Kai to overhaul the company’s systemic oppression… for exposure.
Decolonize
Pronounced: /diːˈkɑːlənaɪz/
Definition: The act of removing colonial influence from everything, including—but not limited to—education, fashion, food, and, inexplicably, yoga. Bonus points if you say it while holding crystals.
Decolonize Your Mind
Pronounced: /diːˈkɑːlənaɪz jʊr maɪnd/
Definition: A phrase used to demand you unlearn all your Western assumptions—including logic, grammar, and the idea that facts are useful. Popular among grad students who think Wi-Fi is a human right but reading Plato is violence.
Defund the Police
Pronounced: /diːˈfʌnd ðə pəˈliːs/
Definition: A phrase that makes liberals feel brave and makes swing-state voters shit bricks. Means different things depending on who’s explaining it, but usually involves reallocating funds from police to social workers with clipboards and a dream.
Discomfort Is Growth
Pronounced: /dɪsˈkʌmfərt ɪz ɡroʊθ/
Definition: The phrase white liberal facilitators use to excuse traumatizing you during a group exercise. It means “shut up, don’t question this, and if you cry—it’s working.”
Disrupting Systems
Pronounced: /dɪsˈrʌptɪŋ ˈsɪstəmz/
Definition: What you say you’re doing when you hold a march, yell on Twitter, or start a zine no one reads. Real disruption involves power; this kind mostly involves Canva.
E (is for Empowerment)
Embodied Practice
Pronounced: /ɛmˈbɑːdid ˈpræktɪs/
Definition: A workshop where people roll on the floor, cry, and declare that movement is protest. Common among facilitators named Juniper who haven’t worn shoes indoors since 2014. May include interpretive dance about late-stage capitalism.
Emotional Intelligence
Pronounced: /ɪˈmoʊʃənəl ɪnˈtɛlədʒəns/
Definition: The woke IQ test for deciding who gets to speak in meetings. You may have data, logic, and facts—but if you didn’t “feel into the space” first, you’ve already failed. Now please hold space for Karen while she sobs through her rebranding arc.
Emotional Labor
Pronounced: /ɪˈmoʊʃənəl ˈleɪbər/
Definition: What used to be called “being a decent human being” but now comes with an invoice. Often cited when explaining why someone ghosted their toxic friend instead of just using their adult words.
Emotional Safety
Pronounced: /ɪˈmoʊʃənəl ˈseɪfti/
Definition: The sacred state of never feeling challenged, criticized, or slightly uncomfortable—even during a conversation about genocide. If you cause someone to cry by disagreeing with them, you’ve violated their human rights. See also: “trauma response to mild tone.”
Empowerment
Pronounced: /ɛmˈpaʊərmənt/
Definition: The act of feeling powerful without having to do anything powerful. Commonly found in self-help slogans, Instagram captions, and corporate HR presentations during Women’s History Month. Often confused with “validation,” “influence,” or “selling leggings on Etsy.” Bonus points if it comes with a hashtag, a crop top, and a TEDx talk titled “Owning Your Truth in a Capitalist Hellscape.”
Equity Over Equality
Pronounced: /ˈɛkwɪti ˈoʊvər ɪˈkwɑːləti/
Definition: Because giving everyone the same thing isn’t enough—we now need to overcorrect based on vibes. Picture three people trying to watch a baseball game over a fence—except one of them demands the entire stadium.
F (is for Fragility)
Fatphobia
Pronounced: /ˈfætˌfoʊbiə/
Definition: The deep societal terror of larger bodies—now extended to diet culture, fitness influencers, and any mention of kale. Often called out by influencers who film 47 dance videos a week but insist it’s about liberation, not cardio.
Fragility
Pronounced: /frəˈdʒɪlɪti/
Definition: A state of emotional meltdown triggered by exposure to uncomfortable truths, opposing opinions, or mildly critical tweets. Most commonly paired with the word “white,” but available in all flavors of identity when someone just can’t even. Symptoms include defensive Instagram stories, lengthy Medium posts titled “My Journey of Unlearning,” and crying during diversity training—especially when you’re the one who scheduled it.
G (is for Gaslighting)
Gaslighting
Pronounced: /ˈɡæslaɪtɪŋ/
Definition: Once a term for abusive psychological manipulation, now casually thrown around in every disagreement that ends in “you’re not validating my truth.” Basically: “You disagreed with me? You monster.”
Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss
Pronounced: /ˈɡæslaɪt, ˈɡeɪtkiːp, ˈɡɜːrlbɒs/
Definition: Ironic feminist slogan turned unironic lifestyle mantra for pseudo-empowered women who believe in crushing the patriarchy with the patriarchy’s credit card. Usually seen in neon signs, tote bags, and toxic HR departments.
Gatekeeping
Pronounced: /ˈɡeɪtkiːpɪŋ/
Definition: The unforgivable act of saying “no” to someone trying to enter a space they don’t belong in—even if that space is literally your house. Now used to guilt people into letting others cosplay as oppressed identities for clout.
Gender-Affirming
Pronounced: /ˈʤɛndər əˈfɜːrmɪŋ/
Definition: Any product, service, or statement that doesn’t trigger a gender existential crisis. Used in everything from healthcare to haircuts to pronoun pins. If it makes you feel valid, it’s gender-affirming. If it doesn’t, it’s a hate crime.
Gender Expression
Pronounced: /ˈʤɛndər ɪkˈsprɛʃən/
Definition: How you visually and emotionally present your identity to the world—through clothes, makeup, hair, and TikTok rants. May shift hourly. May involve mesh tops. May offend your uncle. All valid.
Gender Spectrum
Pronounced: /ˈʤɛndər ˈspɛktrəm/
Definition: The progressive upgrade to “boy or girl?”—now a vast, color-coded rainbow of identities ranging from “agender” to “cloudfluid.” If you don’t acknowledge it, you’re a bigot. If you do, you’re still probably doing it wrong.
H (is for Healing)
Healing
Pronounced: /ˈhiːlɪŋ/
Definition: A never-ending spiritual side quest where nothing gets resolved but everything gets blogged about. It involves journaling, “boundaries,” and overpriced breathwork classes led by a woman named Sage who once watched half of a Brene Brown TED Talk. In woke culture, healing means processing your emotions loudly, preferably on social media, while blaming capitalism, your ex, and the patriarchy for your bad vibes. Actual growth optional.
Holding Accountability
Pronounced: /ˈhoʊldɪŋ əˌkaʊntəˈbɪlɪti/
Definition: Not “having” accountability—holding it, like a decorative trauma vase. Usually involves forcing someone to publicly apologize, attend a self-reflection circle, and disappear from the internet for three months.
Holding Space
Pronounced: /ˈhoʊldɪŋ speɪs/
Definition: The act of sitting silently while someone cries, rants, or processes their third heartbreak this month—with zero advice, just prolonged eye contact and excessive nodding. If you offer a solution, you’ve violated the space and the sacred code of passive listening.
I (is for Intersectionality)
Identity Work
Pronounced: /aɪˈdɛntɪti wɜːrk/
Definition: The lifelong, unpaid job of figuring out who you are and then constantly reminding everyone else about it. Often involves changing bios weekly, attending webinars, and crying on Instagram Live.
Inclusivity
Pronounced: /ɪnˌkluːsɪˈvɪti/
Definition: The mandatory addition of every possible identity group to every event, project, and casting decision—except, of course, anyone remotely centrist. Achieved through long surveys, color-coded spreadsheets, and the complete abandonment of any coherent theme.
Intent vs. Impact
Pronounced: /ɪnˈtɛnt vɜːrs ˈɪmpækt/
Definition: The sacred mantra of the permanently offended. Your intentions don’t matter. Only how it landed—and it landed wrong, always. Even if you were trying to help. Especially if you were trying to help. Pack up your “good heart” and go sit with the colonizers.
Internalized Oppression
Pronounced: /ɪnˈtɜːrnəlaɪzd əˈprɛʃən/
Definition: The woke explanation for why you don’t agree with them—even when you’re part of the group they claim to protect. “You hate yourself” is now a valid argument. Commonly used when marginalized folks stray off script. Looking at you, Kanye.
Intersectionality
Pronounced: /ˌɪn.tərˌsɛk.ʃəˈnæl.ə.ti/
Definition: The academic theory turned social media buzzword that says oppression isn’t just a straight line—it’s a goddamn spaghetti junction of racism, sexism, homophobia, ableism, fatphobia, and bad Tinder dates. Coined by scholars, co-opted by TikTokers, and now mostly used to explain why a queer, disabled woman of color can interrupt you in a debate and you’re not allowed to get mad. In practice, it’s a complex lens for systemic injustice. In woke usage, it’s a moral scoreboard where straight white men start at -600.
J (is for Justice)
Justice
Pronounced: /ˈʤʌstɪs/
Definition: Once meant fairness under the law; now rebranded as a catch-all term for every social cause wrapped in moral absolutism and pastel infographic aesthetics. Attach it to literally anything—climate, racial, reproductive, housing, haircare—and boom: instant credibility. The more adjectives in front of it, the less actual accountability required. In woke circles, “justice” is less about laws and more about vibes—specifically, rage in a font size large enough to be screen-printed on a protest sign.
K (is for Karen)
Karen
Pronounced: /ˈkɛrən/
Definition: The mythical white woman of middle-class suburbia who weaponizes her entitlement, uses Yelp like a legal document, and treats minimum-wage employees like serfs in her personal monarchy. In woke folklore, “Karen” is shorthand for racism, privilege, and an unholy alliance with the HOA. Bonus points if she’s got a layered bob, a Facebook full of Minion memes, and a meltdown caught on camera that ends with, “I have a right to be here!” In other words, the final boss of microaggressions.
L (is for Lived Experience)
Land Acknowledgment
Pronounced: /lænd əkˈnɒlɪdʒmənt/
Definition: A solemn ritual where you publicly admit you’re on stolen land… right before hosting your third Airbnb yoga retreat on it. Mandatory at events, ignored in real estate.
Languaging
Pronounced: /ˈlæŋɡwɪʤɪŋ/
Definition: Not using language. No, no. That’s for normies. “Languaging” is the woke form of wordplay-as-therapy, where simply saying a thing is a radical act of resistance. Bonus points if it happens during a healing circle with sage.
Late-Stage Capitalism
Pronounced: /leɪt steɪdʒ ˈkæpɪtəlɪzəm/
Definition: A phrase used by people tweeting from $1,200 iPhones while sipping $7 oat milk lattes to describe how broken everything is… but like, with vibes.
Lateral Violence
Pronounced: /ˈlætərəl ˈvaɪələns/
Definition: When two marginalized people fight each other instead of the system—aka, the progressive version of “don’t air dirty laundry.” Usually shouted during activist infighting on Twitter right before someone rage-deletes their account.
Lived Experience
Pronounced: /lɪvd ɪkˈspɪriəns/
Definition: A term used to describe someone’s personal perspective—because apparently just calling it “experience” wasn’t intersectional enough. Often invoked as an unchallengeable trump card in debates, especially if backed up by a Medium blog post and a matching TikTok.
M (is for Marginalized)
Marginalized
Pronounced: /ˈmɑːrdʒɪnəlaɪzd/
Definition: A term for any group not currently sitting at the top of the socio-political food chain—unless it’s a progressive circle, in which case the more marginalized you are, the more moral authority you wield. It’s like Pokémon for oppression: collect enough identities and you evolve into an Untouchable Truth-Teller™. Used generously to describe communities, identities, and sometimes brunch menus that lack vegan options. Bonus usage: slap it in a sentence and boom—your argument is bulletproof.
Marginalized Voices
Pronounced: /ˈmɑːrdʒɪnəlaɪzd ˈvɔɪsɪz/
Definition: A poetic way to refer to people who don’t usually get a seat at the table—unless that table is a panel at a liberal arts conference on race, gender, and eco-trauma. Bonus points if the speaker is wearing oversized glasses and resentment.
Microaggression
Pronounced: /ˈmaɪkroʊ əˈɡrɛʃən/
Definition: A tiny verbal paper cut that may not seem harmful unless you’re listening—with the hypersensitivity of a bat on Adderall. Includes asking someone where they’re from, complimenting hair, or making a face in a Zoom meeting. Offense is retroactive.
Mutual Aid
Pronounced: /ˈmjuːtʃuəl eɪd/
Definition: A decentralized network of community support—or, more often, a Venmo link in someone’s Instagram bio because they “can’t morally work under capitalism right now.” May involve zines, free food, and mild cult energy.
N (is for Nonbinary)
Neurodivergent
Pronounced: /ˌnʊəroʊdaɪˈvɜːrdʒənt/
Definition: A broad identity label covering everything from diagnosed autism to self-diagnosed “vibes-based ADHD.” Often used as a shield against accountability and a gateway into Twitter discourse about why deadlines are a form of ableism.
Nonbinary
Pronounced: /ˌnɒnˈbaɪnəri/
Definition: An identity that exists outside the oppressive tyranny of the male/female binary—because two options are for bathrooms and fascists. Often accompanied by they/them pronouns, septum piercings, and a wardrobe that looks like it was curated by Tim Burton during a mushroom trip. To question it is to risk cancellation; to embrace it is to unlock access to queer theory jargon, thrifted vests, and discourse so nuanced it requires footnotes. Gender? Out. Vibes? In.
Normalize
Pronounced: /ˈnɔːrməlaɪz/
Definition: The rallying cry of every infographic activist trying to make their niche issue everyone’s moral obligation. “Normalize not texting back.” “Normalize crying at Trader Joe’s.” “Normalize being annoying and blaming capitalism.” Spoiler: It’s already normalized—you’re just loud.
O (is for Oppression Olympics)
Oppression Olympics
Pronounced: /əˈprɛʃən ˈɒlɪmpɪks/
Definition: The sacred sport of modern progressivism where individuals and groups compete to prove who’s the most historically, socially, and spiritually screwed over. Scoring is based on trauma points, systemic injustice multipliers, and how many acronyms you can cram into your Twitter bio. The gold medal goes to whoever can deliver the most powerful monologue about generational pain—preferably during someone else’s moment. Side effects include invalidating everyone else’s experience while loudly insisting you’re all about inclusivity.
P (is for Privilege)
The Patriarchy
Pronounced: /ðə ˈpeɪtriɑːrki/
Definition: The invisible force controlling everything bad, from wage gaps to why you cry during “The Bachelor.” Often blamed by people who shop on Amazon Prime but scream about systemic oppression during yoga.
Performative
Pronounced: /pərˈfɔːrmətɪv/
Definition: The go-to insult for someone trying to look woke without being woke—which is ironic, because pointing it out is also performative. A circular firing squad of virtue. May result in social death or forced accountability Zooms.
Performative Activism
Pronounced: /pərˈfɔːrmətɪv ˈæktɪvɪzəm/
Definition: The sacred art of looking woke without actually doing sh*t. Includes black squares on Instagram, pastel infographics, and changing your profile pic during Pride—right before going back to brunch.
Positionality
Pronounced: /pəˌzɪʃəˈnæləti/
Definition: A woke GPS that tells you where you rank on the identity power grid. Before you speak, you must announce your pronouns, race, gender, trauma index, and whether or not you’ve ever benefitted from an empire.
Privilege
Pronounced: /ˈprɪvəlɪdʒ/
Definition: The unearned advantages you never asked for but are now legally obligated to feel bad about. Usually identified by a progressive using the tone of a disappointed yoga instructor. Comes in many flavors: white, male, cis, straight, thin, able-bodied, neurotypical, and fluent in academic Twitter. Admitting it is the first step toward forgiveness. Denying it means you’re part of the problem, probably named Chad, and about to be ratioed into oblivion.
Problematic
Pronounced: /ˌprɑːbləˈmætɪk/
Definition: The Swiss Army knife of progressive outrage. Can apply to anything from a genocidal regime to a tweet from 2009 about tacos. Used as a passive-aggressive way of saying “I’m canceling you, but gently.”
Problematic Fave
Pronounced: /ˌprɑːbləˈmætɪk feɪv/
Definition: A person, show, or brand you love but are required to hate because they said something mildly offensive in 2011. Watching The Office? Problematic. Listening to Kanye? Problematic. Breathing? Working on it.
Q (is for Queer)
Queer
Pronounced: /kwɪr/
Definition: Formerly an insult, now a catch-all term for anyone who isn’t straight, cis, boring, or emotionally available. It’s an identity, an aesthetic, a political statement, and a required label in every HBO cast lineup. Sometimes sexual, sometimes romantic, sometimes just “vibing”—don’t ask for specifics unless you want a 20-minute monologue that starts with Judith Butler and ends with “you wouldn’t get it.” Bonus: comes with immunity from critique, provided you hashtag your trauma correctly.
Queering
Pronounced: /ˈkwɪərɪŋ/
Definition: The progressive alchemy of taking any concept—architecture, parenting, salad—and slapping a rainbow lens on it. To queer something is to deconstruct it, decolonize it, and probably sell it on Etsy.
R (is for Restorative Justice)
Radical Self-Love
Pronounced: /ˈrædɪkəl sɛlf lʌv/
Definition: Loving yourself loudly, unapologetically, and with 16 selfies per post. Usually paired with affirmations like “I am enough” and “Capitalism is a lie, but also here’s my Patreon.” May cause mild narcissism and brand deals.
Reclaiming
Pronounced: /riːˈkleɪmɪŋ/
Definition: Taking back words, spaces, or cultural items your ancestors didn’t ask for, but you now feel spiritually connected to—often while selling T-shirts with slogans like “Reclaiming My Time” or “Reclaiming My Rest”. Capitalism: bad. Monetized activism: inspiring.
Reparations
Pronounced: /ˌrɛpəˈreɪʃənz/
Definition: The idea that governments—and probably your family—owe historically oppressed groups cash, land, therapy, and maybe a Whole Foods gift card. The concept is real. The execution? Still stuck in committee, sipping LaCroix.
Reproductive Justice
Pronounced: /rɪˌprɒdʌktɪv ˈʤʌstɪs/
Definition: The upgraded, socially conscious version of “pro-choice,” now bundled with racial equity, economic access, gender identity, and probably a zine about midwives. It’s not just about abortion anymore—it’s about creating a world where everyone has the right to have kids, not have kids, raise those kids in a utopia free from white supremacy, and get a postpartum healing ceremony sponsored by a nonprofit. Mentioned primarily by activists who correct you when you say “women’s rights” and respond with, “Actually, birthing people.”
Rest Is Resistance
Pronounced: /rɛst ɪz rɪˈzɪstəns/
Definition: The idea that naps are now a revolutionary act, especially if taken on land once colonized. Used primarily by influencers who work 4 hours a week and still post about burnout like it’s trench warfare.
Restorative Justice
Pronounced: /rɪˈstɔːrətɪv ˈdʒʌstɪs/
Definition: A justice system where you don’t get punished—you get hugged and invited to a group circle where everyone shares feelings and drinks non-caffeinated tea. Unless you’re a white guy. Then it’s guillotine vibes.
Road Diet
Pronounced: /roʊd ˈdaɪət/
Definition: A progressive transportation scheme where lanes for cars are sacrificed—nay, ritually purged—in the name of “safety” and “walkability.” It’s like urban planning meets passive-aggressive revenge on anyone who owns a Ford F-150. Roads are “slimmed down” to add bike lanes, planters, or bus stops no one uses, while commuters stew in gridlock and ask why traffic is worse than a Marxist group project. Usually proposed by someone who owns a folding bicycle and has very strong feelings about curb paint.
S (is for Safe Space)
Safe Language
Pronounced: /seɪf ˈlæŋɡwɪdʒ/
Definition: Words that have been stripped of all edge, meaning, or potential offense, then dipped in lavender oil and hand-delivered by a social worker. Used exclusively in HR manuals, activist group chats, and therapy spaces where no one makes eye contact.
Safe Space
Pronounced: /seɪf speɪs/
Definition: A magical zone where disagreement goes to die and everyone gets a participation ribbon for emotional labor. Not to be confused with “reality,” which is a certified unsafe space.
Social Construct
Pronounced: /ˈsoʊʃəl ˈkɑːnstrʌkt/
Definition: Anything liberals want to dismantle because it doesn’t align with their utopia. Gender? Construct. Marriage? Construct. Reality? Optional. Facts? Problematic.
T (is for Toxic)
Toxic
Pronounced: /ˈtɒksɪk/
Definition: The default label for anything that hurts your feelings, challenges your worldview, or uses a tone you didn’t approve ahead of time. Common targets: masculinity, workplaces, friendships, relatives who vote differently, and opinions expressed without trigger warnings. It used to mean “dangerous.” Now it means “I’m uncomfortable and therefore you’re canceled.” Bonus points if you say it while holding a crystal and blocking someone on Instagram.
Transformative Justice
Pronounced: /trænsˈfɔːrmətɪv ˈʤʌstɪs/
Definition: Justice with feelings. The kind where no one gets punished but everyone has to attend a three-hour feelings circle and agree to a healing plan written on butcher paper. Idealistic. Ineffective. Extremely well-documented in Google Docs.
Trauma-Informed
Pronounced: /ˈtrɔːmə ɪnˈfɔːrmd/
Definition: A magical phrase you slap onto any policy, workshop, or yoga class to justify treating adults like wounded baby deer. Usually involves soft lighting, group agreements, and so much disclaiming it feels like you’re ordering emotional takeout.
U (is for Unpack)
Unpack
Pronounced: /ʌnˈpæk/
Definition: What you do when “deal with it” sounds too aggressive and “talk about it like an adult” requires too much accountability. In woke speak, to unpack means to overanalyze every interaction, social structure, and childhood memory until you’ve convinced yourself that brunch is a tool of colonial oppression. Usually involves crying on a podcast or confessing your internalized biases during a Zoom meeting no one asked for. Luggage may vary, but the drama is carry-on only.
V (is for Virtue Signaling)
Virtue Signaling
Pronounced: /ˈvɜːrtʃuː ˈsɪɡnəlɪŋ/
Definition: The sacred art of broadcasting your moral superiority through tweets, yard signs, and limited-edition rainbow-themed product lines. Think: “I stand with [insert cause]” shouted from a $1,300 iPhone made by child labor. It’s activism for people who break into a sweat at the idea of direct action but will absolutely destroy you in the comments for using the wrong flag emoji. Bonus: best performed with a latte in one hand and a vague sense of smugness in the other.
W (is for Woke)
White Fragility
Pronounced: /waɪt frəˈdʒɪlɪti/
Definition: The inability of white people to have a racial conversation without crying, getting defensive, or pulling out their family’s immigration story from 1892. Often diagnosed by someone selling a $30 workshop on how to talk to your racist aunt.
White Supremacy Culture
Pronounced: /waɪt səˈprɛməsi ˈkʌltʃər/
Definition: A phrase that means everything and nothing, depending on who’s using it. Includes being on time, being efficient, and “objectivity,” because apparently even your calendar is racist. Can be cured through long meetings and heavy sighing.
Woke
Pronounced: /woʊk/
Definition: Originally meant “socially conscious,” now used as a Rorschach test for whether someone reads bell hooks or just yells about her on X. Weaponized by the right, overused by the left, and currently being held hostage by marketing teams trying to sell you sustainable socks.
(The) Work
Pronounced: /ðə wɜːrk/
Definition: The never-ending, unpaid, emotionally exhausting process of dismantling your inner oppressor, one awkward apology and overused buzzword at a time. You’re never done. You’re never good enough. Welcome to your new identity.
X (is for Xenophobia)
Xenophobia
Pronounced: /ˌzɛnəˈfoʊbiə/
Definition: The go-to accusation when someone asks, “Where are you from?” and doesn’t follow it up with a land acknowledgment. While actual hatred of foreigners is a real issue, in woke parlance, it’s often used to police any opinion about immigration that doesn’t come with a UN-approved empathy certificate. Side effects include guilt, hashtags, and awkward family dinners.
Y (is for You’re Canceled)
You’re Canceled
Pronounced: /jʊr ˈkænsəld/
Definition: The modern-day excommunication ritual of the digital left. Delivered with righteous fury and a comment thread 200 replies deep, it means you’ve violated the sacred code of progressive conduct—like liking an old tweet, asking a poorly phrased question, or being white in public. Forgiveness? Only if you cry on camera and donate to at least three community bail funds.
Z (is for Zoom Panel )
Zoom Panel
Pronounced: /zuːm ˈpænl/
Definition: The intellectual equivalent of a progressive potluck, where six people with hyphenated identities discuss justice, trauma, and how cis people just don’t get it. Usually attended by the same 12 people who all have competing Venmo links and podcast trailers. Outcomes: zero. Buzzwords per minute: off the charts.