Colorado Pet Custody Bill: More Courtroom Theater

Denver lawmakers are at it again, looking for new ways to turn private life into a courtroom subscription plan. 9 News reports a bill dropped under the Gold Dome that would have judges decide pet custody in divorces like they are sorting out the kids’ soccer schedule.

House Bill 26-1131 from Rep. Alex Valdez in Denver would push courts to weigh the best interests of the pet, not just treat the animal as marital property, and it is headed to the House Judiciary Committee.

The Bullet Point Brief

• A Colorado House bill (HB 26-1131) would give courts authority to determine pet custody in divorce and separation cases.
• The bill would require judges to consider the pet’s health, safety, comfort, and well-being, plus household attachments.
• Courts would weigh factors like who acquired the pet, time spent, expenses, and caregiving responsibilities.
• Judges could consider abuse, cruelty, neglect, or violence toward an animal or a human.
• The bill includes shared-custody orders, modifications, enforcement through contempt, and temporary pet custody in emergency protection orders.

My Bottom Line

I appreciate Rep Valdez, I do. He is not one of the far-left democrats under the Gold Dome that legislate virtue all day long, and his work in the 2025 session classifying nuclear energy as renewable energy was good work.

But this bill?! Alex, what the hell is this?! I love my dogs, Bella and Mr. Goose, with the burning intensity of a thousand white-hot suns. And I can love them like family without pretending the law has to reclassify pets as people for divorce cases.

Here’s the part they skip: we don’t need to pad the pockets of lawyers anymore, and we sure don’t need to tie up the court’s valuable time with a ridiculous statute like this. Colorado is starting to govern like it has nothing real to do.

This turns a divorce into a new lane of litigation, with judges and attorneys micromanaging who buys the kibble and who gets Tuesdays.

Why not adults act like adults and work things out among themselves, or have the courts view the hound or cat the way they always have – as property because it is. Rep. Valdez, you have shown me you are a serious legislator. Show that to me again.

Source: 9 News