The American Society of Civil Engineers just slapped Colorado with a big fat C- on its infrastructure report card—and no one should be clutching their pearls in surprise. Denver7 covered the story with all the shocked gravitas they could muster while conveniently sidestepping who’s actually been asleep at the wheel. Spoiler alert: he sits in the Governor’s office and thinks repaving your road is less important than building a $10 million bike lane.
The Bullet Point Brief
- Colorado earned a C- from civil engineers—also known as “not even trying” in adult terms.
- Roads are cracked, underfunded, and about as smooth as an Amazon return policy.
- Polis-era policies force road projects through a GHG obstacle course like we’re auditioning for ‘Climate Ironman’.
- Fees on deliveries and fuel pile up—but gee whiz! They’re spent on choo-choos, not concrete.
- Wyoming’s roads feel like silk in comparison. So yeah, it ain’t the altitude—it’s the idiocy.
My Bottom Line
Well slap me with a pothole—I’m shocked! Colorado got a C- on our infrastructure and I swear Governor Polis probably threw himself a parade for keeping it from dropping to a D. If you’ve lived here more than ten minutes or driven more than ten miles, you already knew this. You’ve felt every crack through your steering wheel and questioned your life choices at every stop-and-go that leads nowhere but frustration.
I’ve been barking about this for over two decades—from behind planning desks to city halls to commissioner meetings—FIX OUR DAMN ROADS. Expand them. Build them. Maintain them like they matter. But ever since His Highness Polis took over, everything runs through some twisted Rube Goldberg greenhouse gas filter. Suddenly patching asphalt has to be reviewed by a team of carbon-counting mystics before we lay down gravel.
We don’t spend from our general fund for transportation anymore—which is insane—but boy do we love fees! Gas fees, diesel fees, delivery fees—all funneled into “enterprise funds” soaked in buzzwords like equity and sustainability… but God forbid we use it to widen I-25 so you can actually get home before your food turns cold. Nope, the widening you see on I-25 is because we took out a loan on future tolls. True story.
And look—I’m sick of watching us default on what should be basic: safe roads that move people safely and efficiently. Polis deserves this embarrassing grade stapled to his forehead because he’s prioritized optics over asphalt. At this point, I’d trade one Polis vanity project (looking at you, Front Range Passenger Rail) for one mile of functioning highway.
Wake up, suburban normies—the paint on your e-bike lane won’t realign your suspension. This report is a middle finger from engineers with clipboards—now try driving past Mead without losing a tire.
