You’ve got to hand it to the Colorado General Assembly: when it comes to economic idiocy dressed in hero capes, they don’t just dip a toe—they swan dive into the deep end. House Bill 25-1010 is their latest masterpiece, a legislative love letter to panic and populism disguised as compassion. This bill slaps a ten percent ceiling on price increases during any declared “disaster”—and not just natural disasters. Nope. Now we’re protecting humanity from “market disruptions,” whatever the hell that means. Next up: legislation outlawing gravity and Monday mornings.
Let’s be real. Price controls aren’t compassion—they’re handcuffs on the free market, with the government playing savior while small businesses drown. This bill pretends to shield consumers from price gouging, but all it really does is screw over the little guy trying to keep the lights on when supply chains collapse and everyone starts hoarding like the apocalypse hit the clearance aisle.
The bill even allows for a disaster declaration when there’s “an atypical disruption in the market.” Translation: anytime things get weird—so, basically always in 2025. Want to charge $5.50 for eggs because the chicken trucks got snowed in? Sorry, small-town grocer. If you didn’t raise your prices exactly 9.9%, the state’s price cops might be coming for your ass.
The Denver Gazette nailed it: this isn’t stopping abuse; it’s punishing flexibility. Remember the example of a small rural store in a blizzard? If they can’t adjust prices to account for restocking costs, guess what happens? Empty shelves. Broken businesses. No diapers, no bread, no aspirin—just a warm government-issued blanket of false virtue and cold hard scarcity.
Price fluctuations aren’t evil—they’re signals. They tell people, “Hey, stuff’s limited, don’t hoard like it’s Black Friday at a bunker supply store.” It’s how a functioning market regulates demand when supply is shot to hell. But no, we’d rather live in an economic fantasy world where stores operate at a loss and magically restock inventory through goodwill and fairy dust.
And the ten percent rule? Laughable. Costs can spike 30% overnight in a disaster. Gas surges. Trucking grinds to a halt. Labor vanishes. But somehow, in their government-induced hallucination, lawmakers think a static price tag will keep the system humming. What it will do is bankrupt small businesses while the Targets and Walmarts ride it out on bulk inventory and legal departments.
Let’s be clear: I believe in free markets. This bill does not. It’s regulation for regulation’s sake, born of performative politics, not practical policy. It’s a Band-Aid on a bullet wound—with “I ❤️ Voters” scribbled across it in glitter pen.
So congratulations to the Colorado Legislature for solving a problem that barely exists, while manufacturing a new one that’ll hit hardest when people are most desperate. When the next crisis hits and you find yourself staring at a bunch of empty shelves, just remember—it wasn’t greed that failed you. It was the government’s inability to get the hell out of the way.
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